The past year has been nothing short of a whirlwind. It’s been a year of deep reflection, painful realizations, and, surprisingly, growth. As I write this, I want to make one thing clear: this is my side of the story. Not the absolute truth, but my truth – a story of love, labels, and letting go.

What I thought were acts of love, were seen as cries for attention. The times I gave my all, hoping to make someone’s life better, were dismissed as me being an attention seeker. It hurt deeply. But more than that, it left me questioning myself.

I’ve been called toxic. I’ve been accused of being narcissistic. Those words are heavy, and they stick. They make you look at the mirror differently. I’m not saying I’m perfect – I have my flaws, just like everyone else. But those labels? They feel like weights, pulling me down into a place I never wanted to visit.

Here’s the irony: while I’m labelled toxic, I’ve always been the one people can depend on. Mr. Dependable, they say. Yet, in the same breath, I’m told I push myself too hard to prove that I care. It’s exhausting to give your all and still be told it’s too much – or worse, that it’s not enough.

And then there’s the kicker: I’m trustworthy but not the first choice. Ever noticed how people call you when Plan A fails or Plan B falls apart? That’s me – Plan C, the backup, the afterthought. Someone they can lean on but not someone they think of first.

So, after all this, I’ve decided to take a step back. To hold myself. To stop proving my worth to people who may never see it. If loving deeply, giving selflessly, and trusting endlessly makes me toxic, so be it.

I am toxic. Period!

But here’s the thing about toxicity: sometimes it’s just someone trying their best to water a dying plant. They do not realize the roots have already given up. And maybe, just maybe, it’s time to stop watering.

This past year has taught me an important lesson. I cannot control how others see me. However, I can control how I see myself. I’m not perfect, but I’m human. And maybe that’s enough.